The Battle That Ended the Century

The passage describes a fictional duel that took place on New Year's Eve in the year 2000 between Two-Gun Bob and Wild Wolf of West Shokan. Full of absurd events and bizarre descriptions, the piece introduces around thirty colorful characters, each of whom is a reflection of someone from H.P. Lovecraft's environment, under meaningful pseudonyms.

Glossary of Names:

Two-Gun Bob — Robert E. Howard

Knockout Bernie, the Wild Wolf of West Shokan — Bernard Austin Dwyer, of West Shokan, N.Y.

Bill Lum Li — William Lumley

Wladislaw Brenryk — H. Warner Munn

D. H. Killer — David H. Keller

M. Gin Brewery — Miles G. Breuer

A. Hijacked Barrell — A. Hyatt Verrill

G. A. Scotland — George Allan England

Frank Chimesleep Short, Jr — Frank Belknap Long, Jr.

The Effjoy of Akkamin — Forrest J. Ackerman

Mrs. M. Blunderage — Margaret Brundage (artist for Weird Tales)

Mr. C. Half-Cent — C. C. Senf (artist for Weird Tales)

Mr. Goofy Hooey — Hugh Rankin (artist for Weird Tales)

W. Lablache Talcum — Wilfred Blanch Talman

Horse Power Hateart — Howard Phillips Lovecraft

M. le Comte d’Erlette — August Derleth (author of Evening in Spring)

J. Caesar Warts — Julius Schwartz

H. Kanebrake — H. C. Koenig (employed by the Electrical Testing Laboratories)

H. Wanderer — Howard Wandrei

Robertieff Essovitch Karovsky — Robert S. Carr

Teaberry Quince — Seabury Quinn

Malik Taus, the Peacock Sultan — E. Hoffmann Price

Sing Lee Bawledout — F. Lee Baldwin

Ivor K. Rodent — Hugo Gernsback

Rev. D. Vest Wind — Unknown

Klarkash-Ton — Clark Ashton Smith

Windy City Grab-Bag — Weird Tales

W. Peter Chef — W. Paul Cook

Smearum & Weep — Dauber & Pine

Samuelus Philanthropus — Samuel Loveman

Mr. De Merit — A. Merritt (author of The Dwellers in the Mirage)

Wurst’s Weekly Americana — Hearst’s American Weekly