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Hur berättar man när det knappast finns några minnen kvar och ingenting efterlämnat? Det börjar med en bild. Ett spädbarn ligger på ovanvåningen i ett hus och skriker. På nedervåningen ligger en mor som är svårt sjuk. Hon hör men kan ingenting göra. Eller hör hon? Det är där det måste börja. Ur den bilden växer berättelserna fram. Den om modern, Estrid, som flyttar till den lilla byn för att ta tjänst som skollärarinna och om hennes möte med bondsonen Johannes. Om barnen de får. Om bröstcancern, som så totalt förändrar deras liv. Men också den om det skrikande barnet, hon som lämnas bort medan syskonen får stanna hos fadern. Det är hon som i vuxen ålder försöker skriva sin familjs historia. Det handlar om längtan efter att få ingå i en berättelse, en helhet, och hur bristen på detta präglar en kvinnas hela liv.

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